Attitudes Shaped by Grace | Day 41

“Do not let any unwholesome talk come out of your mouths, but only what is helpful for building others up according to their needs, that it may benefit those who listen.” (Ephesians 4:29, NIV)

A bright and blessed morning to you. Almost everyone who has spent time in church knows the sound. The sanctuary is quiet, and the congregation is bowed in prayer. Then somewhere in the pews a phone

begins to ring. Heads turn. Someone fumbles through a pocket or a purse, face turning red, trying to find the button that makes it stop. This morning we follow one man home from that moment, and then we ask which door he walks back through.

What He Heard on the Way Home

A story has been passed around for years about a man who went to church with his family, wanting to worship. During the service his phone rang loudly. He felt the stares from the pews around him and wished he could disappear. After church his children made fun of him. On the drive home his wife told him sharply how embarrassed she had been. By the time they pulled into the driveway, the man felt that the worst part of his week had happened inside the house of God.

The man did not sin. He forgot to silence a phone. It was an ordinary mistake, the kind every one of us has made in some form, and it lasted a few seconds. The responses lasted much longer. A look can say more than a sentence, and a joke at the dinner table can follow a person for days. Solomon describes exactly what that car ride felt like. “The words of the reckless pierce like swords, but the tongue of the wise brings healing.” (Proverbs 12:18, NIV) No one in that family set out to wound him. Reckless words rarely begin with a plan. They begin with irritation, embarrassment, or a quiet wish to show everyone that we were not the one who made the mistake.

Paul gives us a better measure in our key verse. Before a word leaves our mouths, the question is whether it builds the other person up according to what they need right now. A man whose face is still red after a ringing phone does not need a reminder of what he did. He already knows. He needs someone to make the moment smaller, not larger.

Moments like this show us something about our own hearts. We have often cared more about how an awkward moment made us look than about the person hurting in the middle of it. We have spent our words on a quick laugh or a sharp correction when a brother or sister needed a kind one. That is sin, and it is exactly the kind of sin Jesus came to forgive.

The One Who Welcomes Sinners

The story does not end in the driveway. Later that day the man stopped at a bar to collect his thoughts. His hands were unsteady, and he knocked over his drink. Before he could apologize, a waitress hurried over, cleaned up the mess, and asked him if he was okay. The bartender poured him a fresh one, and the people nearby were kind. Then the story asks its question. Which place would that man rather go back to?

The question stings because the answer is so plain. The kindness in that bar was real, and we do not need to pretend otherwise. People who do not know Christ can still be gentle and generous, and God uses that kindness to bless people every day. But no one in that bar could tell the man his sins were forgiven. No one there could give him the body and blood of his Savior or speak a word that lasts into eternity. The church has what the world cannot offer. The sad part of the story is that the place with the gospel was the place where no one asked if he was okay.

Our heavenly Father responds to us in a very different way. David writes, “As a father has compassion on his children, so the LORD has compassion on those who fear him; for he knows how we are formed, he remembers that we are dust.” (Psalm 103:13-14, NIV) God is not surprised when we drop things, forget things, or make a mess in his house. He knows what we are made of, and his compassion reaches us before our embarrassment has even faded.

Jesus showed that same compassion in person, and he was criticized for it. “Now the tax collectors and sinners were all gathering around to hear Jesus. But the Pharisees and the teachers of the law muttered, ‘This man welcomes sinners and eats with them.’” (Luke 15:1-2, NIV) Two responses stood in the same place that day. The religious leaders muttered, and Jesus welcomed. He never welcomed sin, and he called every sinner to repentance, but he drew people close so they could hear the Word that saves. The tax collectors and sinners kept coming because they knew he would not push them away.

The Holy Spirit now grows that same welcome in us. Through the gospel he trades our piercing words for healing ones. “Gracious words are a honeycomb, sweet to the soul and healing to the bones.” (Proverbs 16:24, NIV) The change usually shows up in small moments. When a phone rings during the service, we can offer a warm smile instead of a stare. When a child spills juice in the fellowship hall, we can grab a napkin and say, “That happens to all of us.” When someone still looks embarrassed after worship, we can be the first to ask, “Are you okay?” At home, in the car, and at the kitchen table, the people closest to us can hear the same gentleness that strangers hear. None of this earns God’s favor. It is what grace sounds like when it comes out of a forgiven heart, to the glory of God.

All of it rests on Jesus Christ. He heard harsh words aimed at him all the way to the cross. He was mocked, spit on, and insulted, and he answered with forgiveness. He carried our careless and reckless words to the cross along with every other sin of the whole world, and he paid for every one of them with his life. He rose again, and he still welcomes sinners and speaks peace to them through his Word. Because of Jesus Christ, his church can be the place a man with a red face most wants to come back to. When his people meet an awkward moment with the welcome Christ has given them, the door that man is glad to walk back through is the door of the church, where his Savior is waiting for him in the Word.

Prayer

Heavenly Father, I confess that I have sometimes answered someone else’s mistake with a stare, a joke, or a sharp word, and that I have cared more about how I looked than about the person who was hurting. Forgive me for the sake of Jesus Christ. Thank you for your compassion, which remembers that I am dust and still calls me your child.

Lord Jesus, you welcomed sinners and ate with them, and you have welcomed me. Thank you for the gift of the Holy Spirit, who gives me new words through your Word. Make my speech gracious and healing at church, at work, and especially at home with the people I love most. When someone around me stumbles today, help me to be the first one to ask if they are okay. In Jesus’ name I pray. Amen.

Thank you for spending part of your morning here. May the Lord fill your mouth with kind words today, and may someone speak a kind one to you as well. The next devotion looks at the power God has placed in the tongue and how we can use it to guard our neighbor’s good name.

To God be the glory.

Pray, praise, and give thanks, for God is good and His mercy endures forever.

If you received this message and are not on the daily distribution for them via text or know someone you would like to share these messages with, just have them text “add” to 833-779-8793.